Victories!!!!

Rejoice!

Some days I walk away so fulfilled! Like YES! A client who doesn't engage much with staff was willing to meet with me! Someone else opened up about some things and is open to trying some new fitness activities to meet their goal of a healthier lifestyle. Someone who walked out on me yesterday over the littlest thing had a great session today! Someone else who rarely talks was lured in through basketball - did part of an OT evaluation and then he schooled me on the court! Which is a win-win, because we're building rapport (aka he's beginning to tolerate me), he's getting to be in the position of teaching something he's really good at, and I'm finally learning how to do a lay up! Praise God - it's about time :)

Taking the Good with the Bad

It's so funny reflecting on the past 2 days. Yesterday I was so frustrated with the lack of progress with clients, the flawed system I'm working under, yada yada. So focused on the bad that I couldn't see the good in all that had gotten done.. it was just all "bad." Today, I met all day with clients, which helped me forget about all the inefficient ways things operate here, and it was a "GREAT" day.. So funny.. isn't it ironic that we're concerned with the client's drastic ups and downs and they receive all kinds of therapy when here I am being dramatically up and down? So what's the take away? Focus on the clients. 
Not every day feels good but each day make an impact. Focus on being the change you wish to see.. sick of tense staff dynamics? Be joyful, praise others for what they are doing. Give to them. Realize they are on E and it's not remotely personal. Focus on the people in the here and now, not on the past mistakes or daunting task of getting these people up to independent. Just focus on doing good today.  

Anytime we can put the client's strengths in the spotlight it's a glorious thing.

So this ties in my little basketball incident with all my worries about the flawed system. Because in mental health when you are trying to go leaps and bounds with these client's in their hygiene, home management, and people skills, quality time can get pushed down the list. But they need it! 

If we want them to be independent, we must build them up! Build their confidence. Reinforce their current skills. Hone in on their strong suits!

Because think about it. (long tangent ahead explaining the root of my frustrations.. skip if this will frustrate you). Lots of them have been shuffled around from foster home to foster home and from group home to various programs for the greater half of their lives. The rules are always changing, they don't have steady caregiver figures. The staff is their family.. and are constantly changing too.. Any normal control a kid has in their life (bargaining with mom and dad, getting to go to friend's houses, being part of a sports team or after school club.. having some say in what activities they do) has been stripped away. 

I go home each day but they are stuck with the program. The program is their reference point for life right now. They depend on staff for rides places, for permission to do things, permission to have people over.. and their schedule is in many ways dictated by the program. Various mandatory groups on life skills, job skills, coping skills, therapy, exercise... I can't imagine what it's like to have people constantly all up in your personal business, reading your files, learning about your past, telling you to shower and clean your room and do x, y, and z better.. 

So in many ways, although the intent is to help them become more independent with the goal of getting their own place after 18-24 months, they are receiving a message day in and day out that they can't do things without help from staff. 

So it's a double edged sword. Some clients can be weaned off of staff interference and start to thrive with gradually less assistance. Others have learned a victim mentality from the years of micromanaging and are RESISTANT to doing things for themselves. We call it learned helplessness. It's easier to stay stuck because you get more attention. If you're independent, staff pay less attention to you. Because we're busy putting out fires for those in crisis... unfortunately, more attention is given to poor behavior than good... and although the program is aware of this, it's just the reality at the moment..

Highlight of My Day!

So you played some ball, big deal? 
It gave him a different message. 
He was coaching me. 
Let me say it again: He was coaching me!
The message was different. It read: I need you. You are talented and better at this than me. You are important and without you I would not be improving my game. I will listen to you. What you have to say is valuable. I am interested in learning from you. 

Versus: You need my help. Let me fix you. Let me show you how to do these basic life skills you should already have. Why aren't you doing them?

If we want them to try new things and be willing to work on hard things, we have to build them up. Teach them to teach us. Show them we need them in society - they make a difference. 

Success in OT in this setting is like 80% building trust and 20% using techniques I learned in school. In OT terms this is the "therapeutic use of self" - our biggest tool. Because is they don't trust you, they don't buy in to your treatment. Without buy-in, there's no follow through, effort, or progress. So if basketball is our way of building that 80% for this one, I'll do it every day! 

Now we just need to keep exploring until we figure out what each person's "basketball" is. :)