Touching Lives

Impact

It's not hard to make an impact. A lasting impression. It just dawned on me that wow, these clients will actually remember me. If I bump into them 2 years from now, they may know who I am. So neat! The babies and toddlers I poured my heart out for in my last placement will not remember. :) But I'll remember them - they taught me so much! Anyways, a positive in working with adults.

Consistency is Crucial 

It's also easy to impact this population because their standards for human relations are so low - so tainted by the trauma they have experienced. Childhood abuse and neglect deeply shapes a person. Deeply ingrains that no one can be trusted. No one will follow through on their word or be there for you. As a result, any sane person would build walls to protect from future attacks. High, thick, deep brick walls. 

Little things go a long way. As a staff, telling them the days I work and showing up on those days counts for something. Making appointment times and being available at said times counts. Following up with them if they blow me off, saying look that was my time with you today and you missed it. When's our next appointment? Shows I was true to my word. For some clients, it's having the same conversation every morning that counts. Building that consistency, which they were deprived of in their natural homes, and was stripped away in their system homes (numerous foster placements & group homes). For all of them, it is showing unconditional love - responding respectfully whether they are on cloud nine about a family visit, or impulsive, or pushing limits you've set with them, whether they are in the dumps or fuming. Deciding not to let it phase you makes a HUGE impact. Because in their past these behaviors have led to people quitting on them. 

Whole People.... & Hilarious! 

I want to make a point to emphasize that the clients I work with are whole people. My focus working with them is on life skills which are impacted due to their behaviors, but that is not the whole story. They are not their mental illness; their mental illness is one piece of them. Like that commercial I keep seeing about an inhaler, about asthma not defining someone's life. 

They are so talented! So talented. Some talents are obvious and others lie under the surface. But none of them are visible when looking at my clients as their diagnosis. He is not schizophrenic. He is a young man with schizophrenia who has a vibrant personality, makes great jokes, and knows a lot more about certain topics than I ever would! I learn from him. Not just "oh, she's learning through persevering with his behaviors." NO. I learn from him. Facts. Definitions. Interesting things he's researched. Some can spew off facts about the food industry in easy-to-understand language that's better than I did when educating a client on nutrition the other day... haha! Some are great artists. Some are musically inclined. Some are much smarter than me at solving mind teaser games that seem impossible. Some keep their rooms more organized more consistently than I do! Some have a way of saying the funniest thing at the right time to lighten the mood. Some are very self-aware and self-reflective and honest. The HONESTY is amazing. So refreshing honestly, because as "fully functioning" "normal" adults, we can be so layered with social norms and fears and standards that we don't say what we mean. Well... my clients are quite the opposite.. to a fault ;)... but it is really teaching me to be more intentional about saying what I mean. 



So it goes full circle. As I may be touching their lives, they are touching mine. I cleaned my room today! Inspired by them - because how can I tell them to clean their rooms and put things into practice when I'm not doing it? I've been exercising more - because we're constantly on them about being more active. I'm starting to speak positive affirmations to myself.. you are worth it... your past does not define you.. I'm courageous and stand up for myself.. simply because I'm doing this with a client. And largely, they are changing my world view on mental health. It's not scary, not dreadful, not irreversible. They're just people - just like you and me.